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a bad habit for good readers

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A Life Examined

Vatican Authorizes Prayers Optimized for Social Media Age

by Tia Creighton

Not since the Second Vatican Council in the 1960s has the Catholic Church seen such a change in the Liturgy as in recent times. A first set of changes was made in December 2012 to more closely adhere to the meaning of the original Roman Missal written in Latin. Now, in a stunning reversal, the Church is ditching its adherence to the dead, though revered, language and moving into the “language” of social media, whose bedrock is abbreviations, symbols, acronyms, and pictures.

“There’s been a struggle within the Church over language in the last ten years,” says Bishop Kell Ryan, a member of the Synod of Bishops and an expert in language and liturgy. “Some want to go back to the baroque and alienating language of the past. Others want to ditch words all together and post pictures of Sunday Masses on Instagram. As with all negotiation, we needed to meet in the middle. But something had to be done, because the last, most recent changes that were made alienated Catholics the world over.

“‘Peace be with you.’
“‘And also with you.’ That just rolled off your tongue,” says Bishop Ryan.

“‘Peace be with you.’
“‘And with your spirit.’ Who says that? Why don’t we all just dress in friar’s robes? It was a poorly thought-out change and a giant leap backwards.”

The Act of Contrition is the Church’s first official translation of a prayer into the language of social media. With the newly rewritten prayer, the Church has also agreed that Catholics may now text their confessions into their parish priests.

The Act of Contrition (2014)

OMG! I am Very sad smiley crying for having Red Furious Smiley Thee.
And I Evil Blue Smiley – With Animal Eyes all my Very cool smiley, smoking a cigarette because of Thy just punishment
But most of all because they Surprised Smiley Thee, my God, who art Smiley with a thumb upand deserving of all my Smiley that says “<3? (Heart).
I firmly resolve Smiley that says: “Yes Master” with the help of Thy Grace to Pirate Smiley (with an eyepatch) no more and to avoid the near occasions of Black Devil Smiley

Angel smiley losing its aura


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