because the line for the wrong thing was too long? The long waiting times for vice and pleasure might be the only things saving the world.
How many times have I done the right thing
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Drawn to Scale
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by Sean McCleary
A map can save your life. Say you’re lost midway in the gulf between two known tracks, miles of wilderness around you on all sides. You spot a landmark, you pull out your map and compass, and you can make a bee line for salvation.
My friend Jim has hiked and skied all through the Bridger, Crazy, Madison, and Gallatin ranges—often venturing where people may or may not have ever stepped before—and yet it was a map of his wife that saved him. Let me explain. [Read more…]
Get Slowpoke Police Off Highways
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The most dangerous factor in highway driving is relative velocity. It’s not speed that kills. It’s the difference in speed between you and the object you hit or that hits you. Say you bump your fender against a car traveling at nearly the same speed in the same direction … you won’t be hurt at all. When you spin out and collide with a stationary oak, that’s what hurts.
So, now imagine that you’re traveling along the highway at something near the mean speed for a major interstate, about 80 miles per hour. Suddenly, there’s a pack of cars in front of you blocking all lanes, moving 15 or 20 miles per hour slower than you. You see the problem.
As you spot this bunch of cars, you hit your brakes hard. What happens to the person behind you, who had been traveling at the same speed as you? You eventually get to the front of the pack, and you see that the whole clog has been caused by a highway patrol officer or sheriff’s deputy toodling along at 65.
We propose a solution. [Read more…]
Maui
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by Kerry McArdle Lee
My husband pointed them out. “She came down to the beach on a wheelchair,” he said, “and now the man is carrying her piggyback.” I looked up from my book.
How sweet, I thought. They were probably a retired couple, together for most of their lives. They were probably tourists and this trip to Maui was a big deal for them, considering it was not easy for her to get around. Of course she wanted to feel the water. But what did I know, a casual observer. Maybe they lived on the island, or they came here often and had a timeshare.
The man was walking to the water, his companion easily hanging on to his neck. Straw hat and floral bathing suit, she looked good, but his load was not a light one.
Would my newlywed husband do this for me someday, I pondered. [Read more…]
Government Support for a New Small Firearms Industry
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We at The Stoneslide Corrective propose a government initiative to promote the design, manufacture, and distribution of firearms made for toddlers. This may sound surprising to those who don’t think deeply about public policy. We think deeply. The ultimate goal of government is to minimize suffering. Let us explain how this program will accomplish that.
Imagine this situation: It’s after midnight. I’ve dealt with house guests, cleaned the kitchen, taken care of work emails, but I can now finally go to sleep. On my way to bed I pass the two year old’s crib and hear, to my utter horror, “Hi Daddy!” She’s standing up in the crib, smiling, looking me right in the eye, and I think, I wish she’d just shot me. If she had a little rifle … [Read more…]
Peddler
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by Tia Creighton
I’m standing on the porch of another split-level, post-war modern home waiting for an answer. I have a green, plastic, grocery bag full of Girl Scout cookies, and I know what I’m going to hear. I am out of Thin Mints, and that’s all they want.
“Got any Thin Mints?” a man in a ribbed, white, tank tee shirt’s going to ask while he scratches his electrified salt and pepper hair and tugs his shirt down over his hanging belly.
“No,” I’ll have to respond through the screen door he hasn’t opened. “I’m all out. But I have lots of—” [Read more…]
