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TESTStoneslide

stonesl

In the past couple of weeks we’ve had several requests from editors and writers who wanted to participate in The Rejection Generator Project. By all means, participate! We checked with Sylvester, who said, sure, feeding more raw material into the Generator should be okay as long as we keep close watch. However, he cautioned that text that is not sufficiently venomous can cause it to overheat. We’ve tested systems and run more material through, and so far all’s well.

If you, too, would like to feed a rejection into the Generator, you have a few options:

1) Tweet us: @TheStoneslide #rejectiongenerator e.g: Dear Writer, If you were a Nobel Prize winning author, someone would publish this. We’d still know it was shit.

2) Facebook: Post your text to Stoneslide’s Facebook page: http://www.facebook.com/stoneslide

3) good, old-fashioned email: Send to editorsATstoneslidecorrectiveDOTcom. Put RGP in the subject line.

Editors, this is a chance to say what you really think when a pile of absolute fecal matter hits your desk. Writers, don’t let the editors have all the fun. Pen your own scathing put-downs. You’ll feel so much better afterward. Trust us.

The Rejection Generator Project

stonesl

buy two of her.

If you love something,

stonesl

blame it.

If you hate something,

stoneslIf you’re pained by the loss of something special,

buy a new one.

If you’re pained by the loss of something special,

stonesl

equanimity in the face of others’ misfortune.

The most common human virtue is

stonesl

by L.M.

I never smelled the smoke. The band had barely started playing before the fire alarm went off and people started swarming toward the exit. There is only one.

You made fun of the bands I listened to. This band, The Crystal Method, plays experimental, ambient music. It’s melodic, even rousing, not simply background like much of the electro genre. You liked to mock the bands’ robotic, mechanized names: Zapparator, SX46. When you said their names, you adopted the mechanical patois of the computerized undead. You preferred folk music, melodies dominated by an acoustic guitar, maybe a banjo, or even a ukulele. The ukulele was as experimental as you got with your musical tastes.

A wall of bodies smacks into me with the force of surf kicked high by a storm. I hear screaming, but no individual screams. The many voices muddle together to create a singular noise, a noise very much like that white hush of swirling water that plays in the backdrop when you get rolled under by a wave, your body curling and becoming orbicular, like a nautilus. [Read more…]

In the Rip Tide

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