NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell has determined that a catch occurs when a fairy descends from the sky and brushes the finest neck hairs of the intended receiver with a wee comb. While the catch is underway, the fairy also says in its fairy voice “Oh yes you can” over and over. As long as these standards are met, according to Goodell it doesn’t matter if the ball touches the ground or is snatched away by a defender. After making his decision, Goodell took a few staffers out for a steak dinner, where he told stories of his days playing quarterback and vandalizing special education teachers’ cars at Bronxville High School, in Bronxville, New York. In other news, Yahoo has decided to sell itself at a cookout to be held in back of a dive bar.