Following the recent proclamation by House Republican Thomas Massie that he gets sexually aroused by the thought of Donald J Trump being president, Mike Huckabee has now announced that he has launched a website for other Republicans and Tea Party members who get aroused and then need relief when they think of Trump “running the country like a well-lubed Sybian.” Called “I Jerk for Trump,” the site features still and moving pictures of Trump giving speeches, threatening protesters with violence, encouraging violence in his supporters, and watching his people wash some of his cars. Users of the site can also see Trump watch his people berate some of his other people, such as housekeepers and gardeners. Site user and Alabama Republican Senator Jeff Sessions said, “When I think of his big, strong hands holding a pen as he signs a bill making lawful assembly illegal, I just get so erect. You have to take care of something like that, and I do. I proudly do. I jerk for Trump.” Fellow Republican Senator Richard Burr of North Carolina said, “When I’m with my mistress and I close my eyes and imagine Secret Service agents holding Kim Jong-un on his stomach while Mr. Trump satisfies himself using that authoritarian scumbag’s bung hole, my ejaculation is so powerful. I jerk for Trump. But I also fornicate for Trump.” Huckabee said the site will begin running a subscription service in July that will edit Trump into stills and videos of familiar White House settings. 31-year-old Jasper Klanck, a Trump supporter from Gary, Indiana, who has not been able to work since 2009, after brawling at his daughter’s christening, said he would be interested in using the site “unless that thieving slimeball Huckabee has made it a rip-off.” When told of this comment, Huckabee said, “I’m an honest, God-fearing man. And I stand behind my product 100%. I jerk for Trump. Every decent man in America should.”