There is a 6,345-square-foot home, with marble-tiled bathrooms, fully integrated home entertainment technology, and a professional-level gas grill, among many other amenities, that sits in a grove-like subdivision a comfortable 15-minute commute from the headquarters of Sterling Performance Limited. Tax registers and other official documents will show that this is the residence of Mr. Anthony J. Sun, the chief financial officer of Sterling.
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An Adaptation of Ovid’s Metamorphoses by a Middle Manager
Sing, muse of the middle reach, goddess who wisely keeps her head down, cringer before the throne of the mighty. Like you, I sit high enough to witness the deeds of the illustrious, and yet I would never try to climb to their heights. Watching is enough for me. Help me tell their stories, and what happens when those who dwell in empyrean splendor touch lives of ordinary plane.
Read More...A Middle Manager on Good Manners
In a meeting, you can always find something nice to say about your boss’ ideas.
Read More...A Middle Manager on the Importance of a Robust and Active Social Network
When you bring in your leftover birthday cake and leave it in the break room, make sure you cut out a few pieces first, so it looks like you had people over.
Read More...A Middle Manager on Developing Taste and Discernment as Regards the Fine Arts
People say taste is subjective and that makes it hard to really say what’s great art, but they’re wrong. There’s one way to know for sure. Before you buy anything to decorate your office or your home, go up to the 14th floor, the c-suite, and snap some pictures of what they have on the […]
Read More...A Middle Manager on the Art of Seduction
You have to be patient, my boy. The hottest fire is one that builds over time. Say a new girl comes into the admin pool, and you can’t believe how tight she is. You want to beat through the door to the pen where she sits and holler that you have to have her right […]
Read More...A Middle Manager Fends Off an Attacker with His Resolve and Quick Thinking
CLIENT: This is unacceptable. MIDDLE MANAGER: I’ll get my supervisor.
Read More...A Middle Manager Heroically Fights the Battle of the Sexes by Dispensing Dating Advice to His Nephew
You would think it’s the really dark nose hairs you have to worry about, but actually it’s the light-colored ones. They stand out a lot more. Unless the dark ones are protruding from your nostrils—then you need to trim those, too.
Read More...A Middle Manager Delivers a Speech at His Brother-in-Law’s Barbecue
Have you ever noticed that if you’re standing in an elevator and you fart, someone you know is bound to get on at the next floor. But, you know, if you’re near the coffee machine, the smell of the coffee covers up almost anything. Drug smugglers use it to fool the dogs, don’t they? You […]
Read More...A Middle Manager Discusses Technology and the Modern Workplace
Telecommuting and video conferences are amazing technologies, for sure, but I say there’s no substitute for being in a room with people so you can smell who’s nervous.
Read More...A Middle Manager Embodies the Lion on the Hunt
You’ve seen how, right before a staff meeting, everyone runs to the bathroom, right? It makes sense. Those things can go on forever and the only thing worse than an hour and a half of sheer tedium is an hour and a half of sheer tedium when your bladder feels like it’s going rupture. Well, […]
Read More...A Middle Manager Explains How He Survives
Do you know that feeling when your boss reams you out? Like everything is just flushing out of your bowels and you are total scum? Some people call it humiliation or embarrassment. I call it the feeling of rightness. It’s your body telling you you’ve found your place—you shouldn’t aspire to anything higher. That’s survival […]
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